“You don’t have enough Peoplesoft experience”, “You don’t have any SAS experience”, “Your PHP experience is too light”, “We’re looking for a junior level programmer”, “Your qualifications have been reviewed against the requirements for this opening. At this time we have decided to pursue candidates with skills that more closely meet the job requirements (email from noreply@[snip].com)”, “You don’t have enough BI experience”.

WAIT!! “You don’t have enough BI experience” I actually have over 10 years plus I have experience as an accountant and I don’t have enough BI experience? Are you serious????? If report development, data mining, database programming and transformation, financial reporting, budget vs. actuals is not BI I don’t know that it is (or maybe the recruiter doesn’t).

These are some of the responses I get when I try to follow up on opportunities. The interesting part of all this is I honed my skills by starting ground up. I applied myself to become the best I can be in what I do. Everything that I have done from an IT perspective, I learned on my own. After all, I went to college to become an accountant. For someone to tell me that I don’t have enough BI experience is not only an insult to my intelligence (figuratively) but I wouldn’t want to work for a company who has no clue what kind of talent evaluator their recruiters are.

Companies today are desperate for the best candidate they can get their hands on. And they also want to find the cheapest one possible. As I mentioned in my previous post, I would work for free…just pay my, and my family’s expenses. The lucky employer will not only get a “freebie” but they will get the best they will ever have for the position they want to fill. I can assure you that it won’t take long for them to decide that I am the perfect candidate they would have otherwise rejected.

Recruiters are bombarded with hundreds of resumes a day. I am not even sure if the 30 second sales job in an elevator works anymore. Here is what I can muster up in 30 seconds….

“Hi! Are you looking for a report developer who can work magic with your data? I am your kind of guy! I do it all with SQL Server and Crystal Reports. Got Peoplesoft, Macola, Apprise, Microsoft Project Server, Artemis??? NO PROBLEM!! I can slice, dice, pivot, drill-down, colorize, pie chart, bar graph, dashboard your data. Need it in a spreadsheet? Pizz-a-cake!! Proven with no BS…absolutely! And on top of it all, I can wow your socks off! Here…take my card…(DING)….gimme a call…lets work magic with your data!”

So what to do, what to do……but seriously, take a good hard look at my resume, think about it. I may not be the perfect candidate nor will I ever manage to sell something in 30 seconds but if you’re here for a reason, that’s a good start. Heck, I might even work for free just to prove myself….at least I am a darn good BIer! In the meanwhile, if you are interested in knowing more about why I am so good and how your organization or client can benefit, please check out my resume.